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Bill Clinton Is A Sigma, Jesus Is An Alpha (and An Omega) (Guest Post)

Disclaimer: I am not, or have I ever been affiliated with a Greek-organization (unless IG Phi IG is one. But our charter wasn’t approved. We even had colors picked out and everything! We repped Houndstooth. *shakes fists*). I am not a hater of fraternities & sororities, nor have I ever tried to pledge one and got declined. (In fact, one of my best friends is Greek. *cackles*), so I’m not bitter either. I’m just a snarky blogger who is an equal opportunity roaster. Let tongue meet cheek. If this ruffles feathers, my bad. I don’t want no protesting stroll-offs happening on my blog. I don’t want to have to break any lines on my eCrib & get eJumped by nobody. I come in peace (and IG).

By Luvvie

Folks take their Black Greek affiliations se’ous! Folks rock their letters before rocking that Family Reunion shirt (yes I know it’s flimsy and lime green and has that stubborn ketchup stain on it. But you get my point). If stuck between fighting for their blood brother and their frat brother, a couple of people would pause for a minute to think about it. By the time they make their decisions, one of their brothers has disowned them and said “that’s that bullsh*t.” I’m just saying. THIS lets you know how big of a deal Greek-hood can be to some.

This is why I was taken aback (albeit while laughing uncontrollably) when I found out that William Jefferson Clinton has been inducted as an honorary member of the historically Black fraternity, Phi Beta Sigma.

More after the jump.

At first, I thought it was another internet hoax (like the sighting of Whoopi Goldberg’s eyebrows) but alas, it was true. Especially when I saw one of my friend’s status messages welcoming Clinton to the brotherhood. o_O

I didn’t even know the Sigmas dug Bill like that (not that I sneak into their annual meeting or nothing). I know Black folks love them some Bill but wow! He’s repping that Blue & White now. I’d DIE if I heard Bill Clinton say “GOMAB” (what Sigmas say) with his country accent. It’d come out as “GAW-MAHB”. Does he have enough rhythm to step? Could he stroll and keep up? I know he can do the sign thought because it’s the same as the “Rock Out” sign. THESE are the important questions.

I know some non-Black Greeks in BGLOs (Black Greek Letter Organizations) so the randomness with Bill ain’t because he can get sun-burned easier. It was just… RANDOM. But at least Bill was alive when they made him a Sigma.

I was on GChat with Sean of TheFreshXpress (and a member of Alpha Phi Alpha) and the convo that ensued almost killt me dead.

Luvvie: soo the sigmas inducted bill clinton
Sean: lol yea. you obviously dont know who else they got too…
Luvvie: who else?
Sean: The good Rev…
Luvvie: sharpton???
Sean: yep
Luvvie: stop! LMAO
Sean: lmao I think the Ques need to pick up Dubya, lol
Luvvie: The alphas gon try to pledge Jesus
Sean: Nah…just Barack, lol
Luvvie: lmao! true
Sean: Jesus is already an Alpha
Luvvie: dead
Sean: lol
Luvvie: OMG i just died a lil lmao
Sean: lol
Luvvie: frederick douglass looks like an iota
Sean: Man…on some real…lol… that’s my bruh. I kid you not, lmao
Luvvie: lmao!!! he’s an alpha?
Sean: lmao yea….dont ask me how. posthumously obviously, lol. im sure he died in like 1888
Luvvie: and GTFOH lmao, im cackling in my office
Sean: He had no choice but to accept, lol
Luvvie: i. am. dead. along w/ frederick
Sean: We gon do that with Barack, lol. Wait til he dies then call him an Alpha, lmao

At this point, I was *dead and gone like some Honorary Greeks*. How are y’all just gonna claim a dead celebrity as your bruh or sis?

Then the kicker:

Sean: Stevie Wonder – Sigma
Luvvie: Stevie Wonder is a Sigma??? iCan’t
Sean: I think he’s on Al’s line, lmao. Not positive though. I just read that he’s honorary as well.
Luvvie: lmao!!!
Sean: We have Lionel Richie. He ain’t no Stevie, but he can hold a tune and has better hair.
Luvvie: well can a Sigma bro cut Stevie’s hair so his hairline can rest in peace?
Sean: Lmao

Sidenote: I wonder if Lionel Richie can dedicate “Hello, is it my you’re looking for” to Stevie Wonder’s truant hairline. Just wondering…

Anywho, So Bill Clinton, Stevie Wonder & Al Sharpton are line brothers. Oh the jokes write themselves. Rule no evil, See no evil, Perm no evil.

With that being said, let’s have a Greek draft. Which historical figure (dead or alive) would you pick to be a part of your GREEK organization? (and Jesus is not a participant in this draft. It’s obvious that Jesus is a member of 2 organizations already. He was an Alpha and an Omega. The Que in him turned water to wine. Plus them gold sandals he rocked ain’t hurt either.)

From left to right: Hosea Williams (Phi Beta Sigma), Jesse Jackson (Omega Psi Phi), Martin Luther King Jr. (Alpha Phi Alpha), Ralph Abernathy (Kappa Alpha Psi). Yes. They are/were Greeks in real life.

I could see the Kappas talmbout “Umm… lemme get Muhammad Ali for his cane action. He never drops it. And he was a pretty boy back in his day.” AKAs gon be like “Let’s get Michelle Obama. Her pearls game is on point!”

Anyway, HAVE AT IT, folks! Which historical figure (dead or alive) would you pick to be a part of your GREEK organization?

Edit: Sean also let me know that Hubert Humphrey, Lyndon B. Johnson’s VP is an honorary member of Alpha Phi Alpha. o_O

———————

Luvvie is a blogger from Chicago with a passion for rants. You can catch more of her randomosity at her eCribs Awesomely Luvvie and House of IG. She is also the co-creator of The Red Pump Project, an initiative to raise awareness on the impact of HIV/AIDS on women & girls.

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63 thoughts on “Bill Clinton Is A Sigma, Jesus Is An Alpha (and An Omega) (Guest Post)

  1. Natasha says:

    This was too funny. I am not Greek nor have I ever tried to pledge. I LMAO when I read that Bill was now an honorary Sigma. Really? After the crap he and Hilary pulled. Pass.

  2. lynnderful says:

    I have no Greek affiliation and have not tried either. However, this is the funniest post I have ever read! Ms. Luvvie you are hilarious! And the conversation with your friend had me in tears! If i had my own sorority, I would choose Janet Jackson. Just because it’s Janet!!!

  3. swiv says:

    i’ll be mad for all the Aces and Rocks out there if sharpton is the ace/rock. they should do a reverse line.

  4. I got a TEXT to my phone, like a FWD about Bill Clinton being a Sigma. Interesting. I’m Greek(AKA) and can’t call that! But convo between Luuvie and phrat was sooo funny!

  5. Jherii says:

    I am a Delta and I would love to see Michelle Obama become a member of our wonderful sorority. I read rumors about her becoming an AKA but I don’t think it’s really official.I would love for the Kappa’s to initiate TJ Holmes (that is if he’s not already a Kappa man). He’s so pretty!!!

  6. Diva Deluxe says:

    I’m a member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc.; I would rather see potential members pledge like the rest of us, if it’s something they really want. Inducted members also need to pay their dues, membership in a greek orginazation is supposed to be a lifetime committment. Black Greek Organizations often induct honorary members just to flaunt them around at conventions and include them on websites; I say make them work!

  7. Simply Moi says:

    @ Diva DeluxeYou sound like you may be one of those people who doesn’t believe you’re a real member unless you’ve been hazed. Please say I’m wrong.

  8. Donovan says:

    I’m an Alpha and I find this hilarious. Alphas have pretty much got rid of honorary membership. Some of the honorary members we have historical significance… Fredrick Douglass was inducted because of his service in creating the NAACP which Alpha was a part in creating and grew from.I do think honorary membership is pointless in certain respects. I think people should become members because they want to.

  9. brohemian says:

    i’m an alpha and i agree with donovan: people should join because they want to, not because the group wants to boost its membership credentials.

  10. marci says:

    to coin a phrase….it’s all greek to me…(am reading this overseas…)protective of those letters aren’t you…almost worthy of a dan brown novel…too funny…

  11. Shannon says:

    Michelle Obama is not officially an AKA yet. Also, I get tired of non-greeks analyzing greeks. You say you don’t care, but you obviously care enough to criticize.

  12. blkwrestl says:

    As a member of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity, Inc., I was dismayed when I read about Bill Clinton. I would hope that this is not true. My illustious organization provides needed community support services such as Sigmas Against birth Defects. I just hope the Clinton story is not true.

  13. Brent says:

    At the risk of sounding like…a snob…it bugs the crap out of me when athletes/celebs that are not academically qualified (i.e., either currently enrolled in college or are college graduates) are given BGLO honorary membership. I think the "academic" part is important because, y’know, these are college-instituted organizations espousing higher education and all that.Lionel Richie earned a degree from Tuskegee and was inducted as a "graduate initiate" of Alpha Phi Alpha. MLK actually pledged Alpha at Boston U. in the early 1950’s. Thankfully the Alphas stopped giving out honorary status several decades ago. If you hear of a famous Kappa or Alpha, he either got his letters as an undergrad or after earning an actual degree. But the other frats and the sororities are giving out honorary memberships for the sake of being able to name drop. There. I said it.I have nothing against Jada Pinkett or Alicia Keys, but their honorary membership in AKA is not (in the eyes of this outsider) as justified as honoring Mae Jemison or Michelle Obama, obvious intellectual powerhouses who may not have the opportunity to go Greek back in their day (Michelle went to Princeton which does not have a Greek system, white or black). The Deltas likewise offered membership to Halle Berry. Aside from her Oscar and her fame, has Halle Berry demonstrated specific traits that put her on the same pedestal as Delta initiates like Mara Brock Akil, Dorothy Height or Wilma Rudolph? Or even honorary members like Judith Jameson, Mary McLeod Bethune, Daisy Bates or Ruby Dee? Halle is an icon of beauty, but aside from that…what is her relevancy other than being rewarded for getting "face down A$$ up" with Billy Bob Thornton?Fraternities also bestow membership on athletes and stars with no regard to academics. For every guy like Bill Clinton (honorary Sigma, but degreed) or Emmitt Smith, (Sigma undergrad, earned degree) there are a dozen equally famous BGLO men who neither pledged as a "graduate initiate" nor pledge as an undergrad. These are the special intake situations (such as the induction of the orignal Temptations and J. Anthony Brown into Phi Beta Sigma). But don’t sleep; the Ques do this too.And let’s not digress into how many celebrity Greeks (honorary or not) never graduated, including those who did pledge in college. All I’m saying is being famous is not the same as being relevant. They are not mutually exclusive, but there is an element of one-upmanship at play here. Participating in clebrity worship only waters down the meaning and relevance of BGLOs.

  14. Carrie says:

    Very well said Brent!! I agree with you 100%. I’m a member of Delta Sigma Theta and the one thing our sorority stresses the most is College Education!! So why would we offer honorary membership to celebrities who don’t have a college degree??? And this is off subject, but I’m tired of people in sororites and fraternities who pledged in college sticking their noses up to those who pledged alumnae. Just because most of people didn’t want to get their asses hazed doesn’t make them no less of a soror or a frat. And the majority of people who pledge in college don’t have degrees because they dropped out of college.

  15. Diva Deluxe says:

    Simply Moi,Individuals interested in membership in any black greek organizations must realize that it is a financial committment that extends well after college or grad chapter induction. If Bill pays dues and assists the Sigmas with community sevice activities(Great).For clarification, I pledged undergrad for eight weeks and was never hazed; after going over I never hazed. I am also financially active in my alumne chapter. Greek organizations continue to extist because of financial active members. I’m not sure how you would come to that conclusion that I endorse hazing based on my comments. I don’t endorse violence in any form. Next time you see someone wearing a greek t-shirt, attending a step-show, or driving around with a tag on the front of their car, you should ask them if they are financially active (my definition of real members). One in ten will probably say yes.

  16. Simpy Moi says:

    @ Diva DeluxeI’m glad you didn’t get hazed and I’m glad you didn’t try to haze someone else. But let’s be honest. The majority of people who pledge undergrad get hazed. I’m a Delta, too. I know how much our sorority is against hazing, but if hazing wasn’t a problem, why is it still emphazied so much?The tone of your last post when you said ‘make them work’ sounded suspicious. But I totally agree that real members are active and pay dues.

  17. Diva Deluxe says:

    Soror Simply Moi,You may want to stop trying to read things into my posts. "Make them work" simply means get our t-shirt wearing sorors to participate in events such as the Delta Gems, the Jabberwork, Delta Academy, feed the homeless, turtor students, etc. instead of showing up for the wonderful dances and the Fashion Fair shows. I love my pearls too much to lose them or be fined for treating someone who wants to be like me poorly. I will begin packing for the South Atlantic Regional Conference at the end of the month; hopefully they will not be inducting Hillary.

  18. Diva Deluxe says:

    Soror Simply Moi,You may want to stop trying to read things into my posts. "Make them work" simply means get our t-shirt wearing sorors to participate in events such as the Delta Gems, the Jabberwork, Delta Academy, feed the homeless, turtor students, etc. instead of showing up for the wonderful dances and the Fashion Fair shows. I love my pearls too much to lose them or be fined for treating someone poorly who wants to be like me. Do unto others.I will begin packing for the South Atlantic Regional Conference at the end of the month; hopefully twe will not be inducting Hillary.

  19. Simply Moi says:

    @ Diva DeluxeCalm down sister! I was simply giving my opinion on what you stated just like you gave your opinion. You already explained yourself in your second comment and if you read my comment above correctly, you would see that I agreed with you. Geeesh!!P.S. Hope you have a great time at your conference. I had a blast at mine.

  20. BC Bradshaw says:

    @ Simply Moi…Honestly… I think Diva Deluxe has been more than patient and forthcoming with you about BGLO’s and her stance on greek related issues i.e. hazing… I have not seen her throwing shade at you at all in ANY of her posts… I think maybe we should re-read her advice to stop trying to "read into" a blog post… Wow :-\ Anywho! :)Luuvie, this story was hilarious and I can’t wait to repost…LOL! But this comment wall is starting to get just as funny/interesting..! My goodness! LOL! and much love to BRENT! Well said/written my brotha!

  21. mspearl13 says:

    NEW FLASH: Yes, it’s official, the First Lady IS an honorary member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc.

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