Do It For Love, Sanford-Style

And I don’t mean Fred.

From the Associated Press:

Sanford insisted his relationship with Maria Belen Chapur, whom he met at an open air dance spot in Uruguay eight years ago, was more than just sex.

“This was a whole lot more than a simple affair, this was a love story,” he said. “A forbidden one, a tragic one, but a love story at the end of the day.”

I honestly can’t wait for this movie to come out. It is going to have EVERYTHING. Love on the Argentine! Exotic locales! Hot political sex! Desperate political wives! The ruining of careers! The wasting of taxpayer dollars! Smoldering looks (and emails)! I want it to star William Fichtner and Penelope Cruz. And I want it directed by Pedro Almodovar and I want it in theaters now. Gimmie! Gimmie! Gimmie!

More after the jump.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c
Shut Up, Mark Sanford
Daily Show
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Political Humor Jason Jones in Iran

Oh, Mark Sanford, I know everyone wants you to STFU, but not me! I want you to talk forever about your soulmate! I want to read more embarrassing Harlequin Romance/Telenovela-style emails to your paramour. I want to know every detail and YOU want to tell me! I can look into your eyes and see that every fiber of your being aches to tell the public that this woman had you so damn sprung that you couldn’t help but go bang her on the tax payer’s dime! You want to tell me how hot and interesting she is. I’m just saying — The Snob is here to listen, honey. Pull up on my couch and tell me all about this mami who set your heart aflame. And then, when I sell the screenplay for seven figures I’ll give you your cut, because you’re going to need it as I don’t see your current line of employment lasting much longer.

But perhaps Lynn Cheney can hook you up with her book publisher. She’s written a dirty ditty or two in her day. I’m sure she’ll get you all straightened out.

8 thoughts on “Do It For Love, Sanford-Style

  1. Ha! I write "relationship fiction" and I can tell you, Marky Mark has a contract with Harlequin or a Lifetime Movie of the week in his future. Where is Fabio when you need him?

  2. I know what that older couple was saying: "Who’s that gringo with that hot tamale?" Hee, hee

  3. I was through was Sanford when he said that he was trying to fall back in love with his wife. Adultery is one thing but he continues to humiliate his wife over and over again. I just want him to stop.

  4. Girl, I couldn’t really concentrate on anything that came after William Fichtner..Hmm..that man got a quality to him..hmmmh

  5. He said that whatever the cost he’d have to pay to be with her he was willing to pay it and give up even the desire to run for President. He said that….then why won’t he step down as Governor of the State. what is he waiting for. He rolled the dice and now he needs to do what he said. And I still don’t believe that he didn’t use State funds to be with that woman. This man is pathetic and even more so is his wife. To have my husband stand before the world and spill that he has met his soul mate and this is a real love story and the soul mate is not me. To put this stuff out there so that his children will be teased…..and she wants to stay with him…WHY? He wants to try to fall back in love with his wife? Is she sick? She might as well have taken the stage at the news conference with him. She looks like a smuck to say to the media that she wants to help him work it out. I would have to leave for a while anyway. And then this asshole went to his inlaw’s home for a vacation? What the heck is going on here. I wish they would just both leave that office. Watch next week he’ll have a new story to tell us. What the heck does it mean "I didn’t cross the ultimate line". If that means he did not have sex with them, why is he telling that? These people are really sick. Get off the television and pack your crap. Bill Clinton must be laughting his butt off at these clowns!

  6. Well atleast if he gets kicked out of office he can start writing romance novels or lifetime movies for a living.

  7. So, we’ve got a whore governor in SC and (for the most part) no government in NY. Who’s footing the bill for all of this? Oh yeah….. me and millions of other regular folks who are trying to make a dollar out of 15 cents. This is some bullshit. He needs to sit down and STFU.

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