I was over at What About Our Daughters yesterday and suffered a severe head rupturing upon reading the exchange between WAOD and TV talking head/minister Roland “Rolly Rolls!” Martin and his new black male accountability initiative that just happens to be punitive to women and their children.
I’ve called on pastors nationwide to stop the stream of momma, grandmother, aunts and female cousins coming to the altar for baby dedications with no man in sight. That pastor should say, “Until I personally meet with the father, I will not dedicate this child.” Somebody has to hold that man accountable for his actions. (Roland Martin)
I don’t know how you get a man to show up for a Christening by telling the mother and her family who, you know, kind of want their child to be blessed in the church and loved by Jesus, that the minister will not do the service unless the father shows up.
Um … what? Wait? WHAT???
More after the jump.
If ever there was a baby that needed to be blessed, its the child of a man that has to be hunted down to get him to show up at a church for a 3.5 minute prayer. How is turning away the people who have taken on the responsibility of raising a man’s child holding him accountable? If the man was concerned about what a preacher thought… chances are he wouldn’t have an illegitimate child in the first place. Y’all don’t have to say AMEN! I’m saying it for you.
If anything they ought to be having baby dedications in the hospital room as the baby leaves the birth canal!
Isn’t the point of the entire commentary that women can’t police children and you need a MAN? So why would this, presumably male pastor, send the “women folk” to do his dirty work? How did a call for men to RISE UP and be MEN turn into yet another chore for Black women to complete? (WOAD)
You’ve got this kid, this kid who is starting out in the world in a situation he or she did not choose and you’re saying, “Hey kid, I’d love to bless you in the name of our Holy Father and stuff, but your dad’s a bum so … SOL.” Um, excuse me?
Martin, of course, has said that this “Baby Excommunication Black Male Accountability project (as dubbed by WOAD)” is not about punishing mothers but demanding something of fathers. It just feeeeels like they’re punishing kids and mothers, you see? And besides, Rolly Rolls bellows at WOAD, what solutions did they offer!
(T)o the folks who seem to criticize my solutions, which include personal and institutional accountability, what’s yours?
You can continue with the notion of throwing black women under the bus, but that is total BS. I’m married to an ordained minister. The both of us use our ministry time speaking, teaching and mentoring singles and young couples. We address issues such as womanhood and manhood …
So go right ahead and spend time complaining about what someone else suggested. But if all you’re doing is writing and not taking action, then it’s a waste of time.
If you’re sitting around and not even talking to the young men and women in your own family about pre-marital sex, birth control, and the responsibilities that come with having children out-of-wedlock, then you’re wasting time. If you’re spending more times telling the girls to close their legs but celebrating boys with multiple girlfriends, then you’re a part of the problem.
I often ask the question, “What are YOU prepared to do?”
Well, actually WOAD suggested that the ministers start a paternity ministry that would directly target fathers as opposed to tell women they had to make some guy who they couldn’t get to church if they were on hell’s fire show up for a Christening they A) don’t care about or B) … really, Roland. These folks don’t care.
WOAD picked a wonderful passage of the bible to illustrate why turning away women and children from a valuable ritual in the Christian church just because they made an error in picking mates is wrong:
When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up. (Psalm 27:10)
This means when everyone else fails, God doesn’t. Ministers in their representation and interpretation of the word are supposed to be on God’s team and God is about taking in orphans, bastards, the lost, the unwanted, the unloved, the fatherless, the motherless and all others who are among society’s rejects. If the church starts rejecting society’s rejects where in the HELL are they supposed to GO? If a single mother can’t go to the church for love and support, where CAN they go? And let’s keep it real, if women stopped going to church the damn thing would collapse in on itself in a week. If you’re expecting an armada of dead beat dads to show up to flip pancakes for that pancake brunch you’re going to be sadly mistaken.
And how can you make something about male accountability, yet still focus solely on women and their issues? If this was always about women and their poor mate choices then why call it a black male accountability project? Why didn’t he call it a “pick a better mate” project? And even if that was the case, why punish the baby? Because the baby is who is receiving the blessing, who is being prayed for and prayed over. What sense does that make? What did the baby do other than be born?
The baby NEEDS you, Rolly Rolls. Try harder next time.