Fear of a Palin Presidency By Jason Bourne

One of my favorite baby-faced actors, Matt Damon, aka the guy from “The Bourne Identity,” “The Talented Mr. Ripley” and that overrated film he and Ben Affleck won an Oscar for, has finally said what we’ve been thinking in Palin Haters Anonymous, aka the “Sick of Sarah Palin Club (No Palins Allowed!)

WTF? Seriously. How could this happen? And people are acting like she’s plausible. What? Am I in an alternate universe?

Well, Matt Damon is wondering that too.

“It’s like a really bad Disney movie, “The Hockey Mom.’ Oh, I’m just a hockey mom from Alaska, and she’s president,” said Damon. “She’s facing down Vladimir Putin and using the folksy stuff she learned at the hockey rink. It’s absurd.”

Absurd, indeed! Welcome to the club, Matt. Pull up a chair. Snob reader’s say hello to our newest member!

Damon: Hello, I’m Matt Damon, and I’m like, what the fuck is up with this Sarah Palin woman?

Everyone: Hello, Matt!

The Republicans complained that this was some “name-calling” by Obama’s “Hollywood Elite” friends. (What? Calling a “Creationist” a Creationist is name-calling?) But that’s just them making sour patch faces because outside of The Rock and Ah-nuld the Governator, most Republican celebrities are lame. I mean, Angie Harmon, Fred Thompson and Elisabeth Hasselbeck? That’s not exactly as sparkly as Oprah Winfrey, Jessica Alba, Scarlett Johansson, Brad Pitt, Stevie Wonder and The Clooney.

And that’s the short list. We get all the cool kids. It goes on and on.

Alec Baldwin, Hill Harper, Halle Berry, Sharon Stone, Robert De Niro, Tom Hanks, Will Smith, Stephen Spielberg. It’s friggin’ everyone, man. Everyone worth paying a ticket to see. (Except maybe Alba. Well, she’s hot. I guess you could just pay to see that.)

*Thanks to the many readers who brought this story to my attention! Good job!

22 thoughts on “Fear of a Palin Presidency By Jason Bourne

  1. Only a white man could tell the truth on another white man. Thank you Matt Damon for stepping up and saying what Barack can’t say. I love it. It was a risk and I hope that others follow suite.

  2. Well articulated but one, I don’t think we’re that close to her being Prez as he says. (Gulp.)Besides, doesn’t GW think dinosaurs were here 4000 years ago? Snob, what do you think about the phenomenon of “she’s just like us” as an idea that will carry into future elections regardless of how capable the candidate is. Here’s a column about it in terms of Palin:http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/story/2008/09/11/ST2008091101260.html

  3. most of the time you don’t want to here too much about movie stars political views, but dude has a brain and is very engaged in this election.maybe because Ben Affleck isn’t hovering over him, but i like the dude.Grampy McSame/Caribuo Barbie can have……ummmm Chuck Norris and his Bowflex?! yeahp.s. did any of The View co-stars ever address what Hasselslut said about MichelleO. at some Repub function????

  4. I didn’t know The Rock was a republican. Why? Oh he probably doesn’t want to pay taxes on his movie salaries. Oh well. That’s another guy I can add to my do not watch list. And Matt Damon is on the money about the Wicked Witch of the North.Sandy

  5. ezra: I think what that column in the WashPo is describing is horrifying. The American Idolization of what is supposed to be serious. We’re talking about the vice president of the United States. Not a stress stay-at-home mom on “Super Nanny.” I think the “she’s just like us” logic is dangerous and flawed thinking.People who think that should ask themselves, “Are you qualified to be vice president of the United States?” If your answer is “no,” that should tell you that someone “like you” should not be anywhere near the presidency.anonymous 10:45 am: I based The Rock assumption on the fact that he attended the RNC in 2004. Anything could have happened to his political beliefs since then, but when you show up at a Republican convention people are going to conclude you’re a capitalist pig … no disrespect. Or a crazy churchnik, which I don’t think The Rock is.So I’m going with capitalist.

  6. I would like to think that we are not that close to her being a heart beat away – but the reality that scares me is that people collectively DO NOT THINK! That alone is what gives her a chance. If people actually exercised a brain cell she would have been laughed off the stage – out of the building and back to moose junction. Hollywood wrote the book on surreal and alternate realities and if they are sensible enough to call this a surreal mess then – it is too deep for words. People need to be reminded not to under estimate the power and range of stupidity and blind mindlessness. A fool with a tool is still a fool and it’s got a weapon! This is not a movie and there will be no Denzel, or Bruce or Clint to the rescue – save yourself – vote against McSame and MooseMom.

  7. Next thing you know, Bono will be calling this heifer out and everybody’s gonna get excited.

  8. Sheer bravery on the part of Matt Damon to speak out in the middle of the hubbub over Palin. He’s part of the smart Hollywood liberal “elite” and I love him for it. Incidentally, I believe you’re right about the Rock, Danielle. He proudly wore his Republican politics on his sleeve several years ago, and is probably still towing the sell-out party line. Peace always

  9. i saw a semi celeb at the rnc (although i can’t prove it 100% so i won’t name him) and he looked like he was embarassed to be there…even chuck norris isn’t shouting out his love as he did for the huckleberry…i mean huckabee…

  10. Is celebrity really a factor? Should the fact a celebrity supports a certain candidate even be relevant? Most actors and actress are left leaning. Many more are also college drop outs and have little understanding or politics, foreign policy, and economics. Does their celebrity really outweigh all of that?

  11. @Zabeth Matt Damon has a right to his opinion cause as an American its his God given right. It doesn’t matter that he’s a celeb; he has the right to question the qualification of the pitbull who wears lipstick!If Actor John Voight can openly criticize Obama and be an official speaker at the RNC then Matt Damon can have his say. John Voight is Angelina Jolie’s Dad and he has a sphere of influence as well…

  12. Well said, Zabeth. Many emptyheaded celebs are GOPers – Bo Derek, Shannon Doherty, Jon Voight, Bruce “I’ll put in $1M of my own money to find Osama” Willis, Chuck Heston, Ron Silver, Patricia Heaton, John Corbin, et al.The Rock is a Republican?! He is officially of my Hottie list.Bourgietopia

  13. Zabeth, I hate to beat a dead horse, but isn’t it elitist (GOP’s favorite catchphrase) to assume that college-dropouts have “little or no understanding of politics, foreign policy and economics?” In Good Will Hunting (Loved it!), Matt Damon’s character attacked academic snobs with his under-schooled genius IQ. I think most of Hollywood is “left leaning” because they never forgot the hardships and struggles they endured to get where they are today. Some people retain empathy for their brothers and sisters, while others simply believe in the survival of the fittest doctrine. That’s basically the big difference I see between the Republicans and Democrats.

  14. Zabeth, Just so you know, Matt Damon attended Barack Obama’s alma mater, Harvard University, and could have graduated in 1992 but he deferred classes to take acting projects. He wrote “Good Will Hunting” while attending Harvard. He’s been politcally involved and active for years. I’m a little sensitive to this because, although I’m not a celebrity, I do make my living as an actor. I have a master’s degree and have been involved in politics and social justice projects since high school. I could list a number of college-educated and politically active actors and musicians like the aforementioned Hill Harper, Natalie Portman, Edward Norton, Meryl Streep, Steve Martin, and John Legend (all Ivy League grads), as well as countless other celebrities who may not be as publically vocal but are well-educated, politically knowledgable and internationally savvy. Don’t let intellectually bankrupt and socially vapid pseudocelebrities like Paris Hilton or reality show “stars” fool you into thinking that a prerequisite for fame is to check your mind at the door.

  15. My point isn’t that he doesn’t have a right to his opinion because he does. Don’t put words in my mouth. My point is so what? Who cares what he thinks? Should his opinion really sway you? Shouldn’t you base your vote on your beliefs and values not what a celebrity thinks or to jump on a celebrity bandwagon? Second, yes there are right leaning celebrities; but, the leftists far outnumber them. Third, movies aren’t reality. I’m also not saying a college degree is the end all be all. I just don’t think someone should be given a platform to preach simply because they’re in a movie. What kind of prerequisite is that? America’s celebrity obsession is a problem. Hey I love Matt Damon too (maybe a little bit less now), but not every actor with a point to make is as educated or as savvy as he is. Of the actors and actress who are educated many studied subjects like theater, music, art, etc. These aren’t subjects that will really acquaint you with matters of the world (i.e. business, politics, economics, international politics, etc.). Now I’m not saying an art major can’t have an opinion or understanding of economics. What I am saying is that that should be something taken into consideration when weighing a persons’ POV especially when that person has an audience of millions and no other knowledge or experience. Many celebrities do live in a bubble.

  16. You’re right, Zabeth, it’s a matter of point of view. Just as you’re turned off by liberal celebrities, I want to puke whenver I hear Chuck Norris and country singers, for instance, express their conservative opinions. I’m lucky. I only have to hit the mute button when Lou Dobbs, Glenn Beck and a few others are on TV. Thank God for the liberal media.

  17. Although many actors majored in the arts, there are many others who majored in political science, social sciences, or history. Regardless, celebrities give up a huge part of their privacy and autonomy when they attain that status, and not all sought celebrity as opposed to a chance to practice the art and craft that they love. I’m not bothered if part of the trade-off for that is them gaining a public platform to express their views. I certainly don’t align my political opinions with those of celebrities, but we tend to like and respect those who are like-minded and engaged in the world, so if I have additional respect for Matt Damon for speaking out, it is not the same as drinking celebrity Kool-Aid. Especially since when celebrities do take political and social stances, they may alienate as many as they impress. So I appreciate his willingness to take a risk as well.

  18. I wasn’t joking about the liberal media, Zabeth. I’m glad that it’s slightly slanted to the left. I guess journalism appeals to our better angels. I refuse to watch Fox and I’ve been boycotting conservative talk shows for a long time. Liberals should tune out O’Reilly too. That man is making money hand over fist and they have no one to blame but themselves. Just say no way, no how, no O’Reilly!

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