Week In Pictures I: The Good Naomi and Chris Brown Please Put Your Shirt Back On

This is the Naomi Campbell I like to see. The non-violent, sober, lovely, baby cuddling Naomi Campbell, all smiles as she participates in the Africa Rising music, fashion and arts festival earlier this month. These pictures taken of the festival from July 11 – 13 show black folks at their best. While Naomi and fellow ridiculously beautiful person Tyson Beckford star in the movie of my head called “Two extremely attractive black people make cute faces at adorable Nigerian babies,” hip hop/R&B stars from the states rock the crowd.

While Rihanna is Rihanna and Jay-Z is Joe Camel, it is Chris Brown and his sudden need to take his shirt off all the time that’s concerning me the most. Put it on, Chris. Put it back on.

Here are the best pics from Africa Rising.

Sigh. Enough beautiful baby cuddling with two of the world’s most photogenic people (seriously, they are unnaturally beautiful people and they’re like BFFs too. It’s too much. Does Tyson hand Naomi the jar of Vaseline she uses to grease her face up before beating some fool down? Does he say, “No, not the new iPhone, girl. Use the Nokia!”)

Time for the show and where there is show there is Camel Joe. Rock it.

“Nigeria! Throw up your dynasty signs!”

Usher was also on hand to be Usher. Sweaty. Hardworking. Trying so hard to be sexy, yet still doing nothing for me, Usher. I can get more out of a completely clothed Tyson Beckford with a baby.

I realize that Chris Brown is trying to compete in the Usher Raymond Era (which is the Post-R. Kelly Era. At this point, I think Kells is trying to keep up with Usher rather than the other way around. Did Usher really need Kells on “Same Girl” that bootleg, awful recreation of “The Girl Is Mine?” I think not.) So because the competition from the other shirtless wonders is so hot Chris has to hit the gym and get his 12-year-old boy frame into killer shape. And he can cover that frame in as many tats as he wants, wear as many red stocking caps and make as many hard rock stances. Nothing coming out of his baby mouth sounds hardcore. And I love his duet with Jordin Sparks, “No Air,” and that’s about as far from hood as you can get with a ballad. Basically, I’m tired of the foolishness, Chris. Everyone can’t be Usher Raymond IV. Put your damn shirt on and be Chris Brown.

Quit playing.

Really.

Put that shit away. It’s like looking at a “sexy” fetus. It’s all kinds of wrong.

Side note: And in case you were worried they’d been kidnapped. Nick and Mariah and Mickey Mouse. Yes. WTF. WTF, indeed. Between this and their trip to Six Flags with the cupcakes I’m THIS CLOSE to guessing their next photo op will be in Branson, Mo. cavorting in Silver Dollar City before hitting up Fantastic Caverns in the Ozarks.

Please. STOP. PLAYING! (Picture from Blog Envy Is the New Black)

5 thoughts on “Week In Pictures I: The Good Naomi and Chris Brown Please Put Your Shirt Back On

  1. Snob gurl.Imma have to respectfully disagree with you on Ursh. I always thought dude was switch-hitter but marriage and a baby are looking right on a brother. Have you seen the Essence Mag shots of him and his little munchichi? Just adorable. Chris Brown. Mmmmmm. Dude think he’s a man man because he’s knocking Rihanna. I guess I would be feeling mahself a little too.And yes. It does not make one lick of sense that Naomi and Tyson are given all of that delicious beauty. Two solid tens indeed.Nick is holding on to his ATM tight. (I’m kidding) I believe they are trying to really enjoy each other. Nick just always has that stunned”did I really win the lotto?” look on his face.

  2. Naomi and Tyson look amazing. I’m not touching on the weave/hairline bizness right now.Mariah and Nick. I still don’t know what to say. He just seems out of his depth completely. LOL

  3. Hi there snob!I just wanted to stop by and say thank you for the photo link on this page. I am a great admirer of your blog and so I am particularly honoured that you visited and linked back. Also, wanted to let you know that I have added you to my new blog roll. Take care and stay snobby (lols)

  4. That post alone nearly made me bust out laughing in the local library where I am doing my penance for trying to over-achieve (a.k.a. — studying for the bar exam that’s in like a week).As far as Chris Brown is concerned — he dose nothing for me but teens today are demanding of their stars. So his shirtlessness wasn’t for us — it was for my 15 year old little cousin. Though the fact that I do admire his trainers work makes me feel quite dirty (what! he does have nice abs…).And is it just me or does Nick Cannon-Carey look as if he has Mickey sized feet in that photo? And as much as I want to hate on it — I mean, if you go to Disney who doesn’t get their photo taken with Mickey? So why should they have to refrain…other than she could have just worn a normal shirt. Seriously.

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