Random Obama Staffer Gossip O' the Week: Jon Farveau and Rashida Jones dating?

This photo is totally not real.Both this story and this lovely Photoshopped picture via Best Week Ever. The humorous blog is saying one of my favorite Incognegroes, Rashida Jones (the daughter of music mogul Quincy Jones and actress Peggy Lipton) may or may not be dating Obama Speechwriter Jon Favreau.

Jones, who is currently starring on NBC's Parks and Recreations was allegedly seen getting tipsy on a Friday night with the 27-year-old Favreau.

Details after the jump.

Click to read more ...

When Being An Incognegro Gets You Accidentally Opted Out of Minority-Land (Update!)

I wish I could find the audio for it, but I'm going to have to ask you all to take my word for it. During Major League Baseball's Home Run Derby Monday night ESPN's announcers remarked that this was the "whitest" line-up ever with no Latino ballers and no black players. And as they laughed over the absurdity of this while Josh Hamilton went for his record breaking 28 homers in the first round, everyone forgot about about the secret Negro raging inside of Cleveland Indian center fielder Grady Sizemore. The not-black-black-man hit six homers in the first round, which would have been decent any other year accept Hamilton's 28-homer freak year.

It's not Grady's fault he doesn't give off that Jason "Don't believe your lyin' eyes" Kidd vibe. Every incognegro can't be a flaming incognegro!

Thank you reader Ciara for the video link!

PS. Grady was the first incognegro I wrote about for my Incognegro series.

Ask The Snob!

Ever since I started this blog I have received mail from people of all nationalities about black people and black issues. I try to be welcoming of all people and all points of view because I want to encourage openness in the best interest of improving race relations and ethnic divisions. No judgments, just frank answers as best as I can give them.

From now on when I receive a particularly good letter I'm going to highlight it on the blog and encourage others to ask me anything and I'll give an answer as honest and as informed as I can.

If you have a comment or question for The Snob email me at blacksnob@gmail.com.

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Hi Danielle,

My name is Stephanie and lately I have been trying to find who I am.

Well, I know who I am in a way but in another way I don't.

To make a story short my grandfather on my mum's side was African American (she was born at the end of WW2).

I have been reading a lot about African Americans lately, I read about the notion of "passing." Well I guess that here in Belgium I am kind of passing although I always tell people about my roots. My Dad is white as chalk and my mum is brown and I am white with green eyes. When I tell my story to people, they take a closer look at me and usually say, yes I can see it in your features.

Now my is question: What do you call someone like me? Someone whose grandfather was African American?

One thing I am sure of is that I am proud of my roots, even if I have never met my grandfather. My mum never got to know him either. She doesn't even know his name. Shame on the grandma for this.

Well, I hope I am not annoying you with my babbling and questions.

Take care and thanks for reading this,

Steph Brouwers

Hi Stephanie,

Your story is interesting. Traditionally, in the United States anyone with any African ancestry is considered black or African American. Things have changed some where individuals who are biracial or have a black grandparent may identify themselves as bi- or multiracial, but despite this slightly more relaxed attitude people white and black in the US tend to adhere to the "one drop" rule. It's based on a post-slavery law adopted throughout the US that labeled all people with African ancestry, no matter how minuscule, as black. That's where the rigidness over the issue comes from.

Basically all African Americans are mixed -- usually with white (primarily French or English), West African and Indian (Native American) blood,. This isn't so much dissimilar for how it is for other blacks throughout Central and South America, as well as the Caribbean although their white blood tends to come from the French, Spaniards and the Portuguese. But because of the degree of racism in the US there is a form of solidarity among all people with black blood. We all faced the same discrimination and harassment. Some people who don't look black at all, like yourself, are quite adamant in identifying themselves as black. But in modern times other individuals who look black, like golfer Tiger Woods, insist on being seen as a multiracial person.

I don't know if this helps you any. Most of the terms created for the different degrees of biracial people are considered offensive now. If you were biracial, having one black parent, you were mulatto. In your case, with a grandparent, you'd be a quadroon. But like I said, these terms are considered offensive in the states.

Also, the general rule for most multiracial people in the US is "you are what you look like." If people look at you and see a black person that is how you'll get treated no matter what. If you do not look black it's understandable to just refer to yourself as bi- or multiracial.

I think it's good that you want to learn more about your African American roots. It's always good to learn where you came from and about different cultures. And I wouldn't worry too much about the "passing" aspect. If you're honest about who you are and comfortable with who you are that's all that really matters. You, the individual, are not limited to or defined by your ethnicity solely.

Good luck in learning more about your family and culture. If you have any other questions just drop me another email. I'm always happy to help.

Yours truly,

Danielle aka "The Snob"

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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Author Shelby Steele

On Black Conservatives

I just saw Shelby Steele on Hannity's America and what I can't understand is why these Fox News Uncle Tom's (Steele, Larry Elder, Juan Williams) aren't smart enough to know that the white man is just using them to try and disgrace strong black men.

These black men have obviously lost their minds and I bet when they see black people coming toward them on the street, they turn and go the other way from fear. It really bothers me to see Fox News use these house Negroes to try and sway blacks and whites not to vote for Obama. Obama has surrounded himself with skilled young and old people who make McCain look like an old fool. It seems like all McCain's campaign does is wait to see what Obama says and does and then criticize him. If Obama looses, it's only because he's black. He has been running circles around McCain and the old fool can't seem to figure him out. Obama is so much smarter than McCain.

CB
Dallas, TX

Let me compliment you on this very fine piece of writing (Black Conservatives on Barack Obama). It was both insightful and thought-provoking.

As a black conservative it is rare that a confessed liberal will give credence to the fact that black conservatives have a right to exist without being considered anathema’s to our ethnic designation. I was a liberal for many years, but 20 years of Pastoral ministry in Gary, IN has taught me that the social policies of liberals are not working for blacks.

I would agree with J.C. Watts that the Republican Party has done little to reach out to blacks, and seems to have conceded the black vote once again. This being said, I favored Mike Huckabee, and I still struggle with McCain. I am truly in awe of the historical moment before with Sen. Barack Obama; however policy is the deal breaker for me. I just do not believe the evidence supports success of his policy proposals. I say this in the face of the huge disappointment G.W. Bush has been as a President.

Thanks for your opinions, and I hope to keep reading them.

Raymond C. Dix Jr.
Senior Pastor
Berean Fellowship Baptist Church
Gary, Ind.

SPECIAL REQUESTS

Tiger Topless

If that heading doesn’t look like spam I don’t know what does.

Much for the reason I found you, TJ Holmes, I have also much wanted to see a picture of Tiger Woods showing more skin.

Sharie B.

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If you have a comment, question or request give it up to The Snob and I'll see what I can do. Just email me at blacksnob@gmail.com. Also, The Snob is still broke folks. Please help feed a Snob and donate a lil' somethin' somethin' via PayPal. Every little bit helps!

Lower Your IQ: Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey Allegedly Married. Allegedly.

Everyone take your brain out for a breather ... the Associated Press is reporting that allegedly Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon got married.

I know.

Just ... just let the stupidity envelop you. Nick Cannon, who's not funny, and Mariah Carey, my favorite Photoshop Diva, have tied the knot, allegedly, in the Bahamas, allegedly. And can I say "allegedly" enough? No I can't. Allegedly. Allegedly. Allegedly.

Nick Cannon is cast as Mariah Carey's lover in her new video — but has the superstar diva given the young actor a considerably bigger role in real life?

According to several published reports, Carey, 38, married Cannon, 27, on Wednesday. Neither Carey's publicist nor Cannon's manager returned requests from The Associated Press for comment.

If the pair did indeed wed, it would be a whirlwind romance. Word that the two were seeing each other first surfaced in the last few weeks. Last Saturday, Carey was seen sporting a huge diamond ring on her finger at the Tribeca Film Festival premiere of her movie, "Tennessee," in which she plays a waitress. Cannon was at her side at the party. Speculation swirled that the couple were engaged.

I smell fix because this makes no sense. Mariah Carey and Derek Jeter, that was hot not-black-black-person sandwich. Mariah Carey and Eminem. Dysfunctional, but Mariah's kind of trashy so it still made sense. Nick Cannon of Nickelodeon? This does not compute.

This is the same Nick Cannon who seems to do pretty women drive-by relationships. Who seems to hop on whatever chick is hot at the moment -- from singer Christina Milian and Negrophile Kim Kardashian and Victoria's Secret model Selita Ebanks. If she's got cache, he wants to cash in.

Feel free to give all this the alleged side-eye.

Incognegro VI: Saul "Slash" Hudson

There are lot of musically gifted incognergoes in the world, but none rock harder than Saul Hudson, a.k.a. "Slash," founder of Guns N' Roses and Velvet Revolver.

While a lot of people love late 80s/90s era "hair" guitar bands, the only one I ever liked was Guns 'N Roses. I was into New Edition at the time and didn't realize I liked them until "November Rain" came out and MTV played the long format version of the video 100 times a day.

Maybe it was the cinematic feel or the orchestral sound or the fact that it was an epic rock ballad, like everything ever made by Queen. But around view 50 of the song I didn't know I liked I realized what it was.

It was Slash.

If you haven't seen the video, my God! Stop reading this now and click here! But if you have seen it you'll remember that around around 4:12 into the video Slash walks out of the church and into the desert and plays, what was at the time, the most "awesome thing ever" while a desert twister tosses that tangly mane and a cigarette clings on to dear life between his lips.

While my current "most awesome thing ever" varies between the Giants beating the Patriots in Super Bowl XLII and cheap vanilla flavored coffee from Huck's, Slash's guitar solo from "November Rain" is still in the top 20, tied with Prince's guitar solo on "When Doves Cry."

It's that good.

Since then Slash has reigned as king of the incongergo rock guitarists in my heart. (Sorry, Roxie Roker's son.) And it's not just because he can rock, oh no. It's also because God gave us the same hair.

Now while mine is considerably shorter, it's equally as unmanageable. And while Slash, I'm sure, doesn't do anything to his 'do, I seriously couldn't live without conditioner and lots of hair product otherwise no one would ever be able to see my eyes either.

I also like the stove pipe hats. Tribute to Lincoln perhaps? And the ubiquitous cigarette. And the crappy T-shirts, leather and denim. You know exactly what to get Slash every birthday (besides fine grain alcohol, Colombian blow, some Hendrix and ass-less chaps). And as long as it doesn't have a Hot Topic tag in the back--I gather he'd prefer Goodwill--he'll likely wear it.

As an artist Slash pops up on his fair share of non-GNR/Velvet Revolver work. He was the only good thing on Michael Jackson's crappy hit "Black or White" from the Dangerous album. Mike was more up to snuff on "Give In to Me," also on Dangerous, also featuring Slash.

(It was his best rock guitarist collaboration since Steven Stevens ripped it up on "Dirty Diana.")

Along with being nattily outfitted as a memorable rock deity, Slash also has a stamp on his sound and style. You know his music just by listening. You know his look even if you've never heard of GNR. Slash is so iconic in the guitar/metal/rock world that he got his own featured spot on the game Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock. You have to beat him in the final level of the game and after winning he becomes a playable character. To be honest, I never paid a lick of attention to Guitar Hero. (It's all about Dance Dance Revolution.) But I was in love when Slash popped out of a dude's mouth in a commercial for the game.

Slash gets his not-black-black person credentials for being the son of a white Brit and a black American costume designer, born in London and raised in Stroke-on-Trent in Straffordshire. At 11 his parents moved him to Los Angeles where later the rock bug would get him. At fourteen his granny hooked him up with a guitar and the rest was rock legend history.

Said Slash to Rolling Stone:

My big awakening happened when I was fourteen. I'd been trying to get into this older girl's pants for a while, and she finally let me come over to her house. We hung out, smoked some pot and listened to Aerosmith's Rocks. It hit me like a fucking ton of bricks. I sat there listening to it over and over, and totally blew off this girl. I remember riding my bike back to my grandma's house knowing that my life had changed. Now I identified with something.

Thank God. He could have grown up to become one of those boring not-black-black-people who live ordinary lives as doctors, business executives and St. Louis politicians.

No, no. Rock God is much better.

This entry was suggested by Snob reader Starrie. Thanks, Starrie! If you have any Incognegro candidates to recommend, just email me or post your suggestion in the comments below.

Incognegro V: Rashida Jones

Wow. It seems like forever since I did one of these, my many posts about the "secret Negro inside," the not-black-black-peoples of America who straddle in the nether regions of "I don't look black." In America it doesn't matter who you are, it's about what you look like. So this is my regular celebration of the not-black-black-peoples such as major league baseball star Grady Sizemore, insane supermodel Kimora Lee Simmons, flashdancer Jennifer Beals and my favorite not-black-black-person, delicious actor Wentworth Miller.

So after a long hiatus ...

Incognergo V: Rashida Jones

Habitual sidekick/utility actress Rashida Jones is the daughter of actress Peggy Lipton and music mogul Quincy Jones. We all know that Quincy loves the white women so no knock on Lipton, but c'mon, his wives are pretty and blond. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's true.

She's sisters with Kidada Jones (left, with father Quincy Jones), also Lipton's daughter. Rashida is primarily an actress while her sister is a fashion stylist and model/actress. Rashida's also the brainy more disciplined one, whereas Kidada was the wild, reckless rebel who got Tupac's face tatooed on her arm. Rashida's technically the more successful actor of the two and she's also the one who looks the least black (but not by much).

I see a black woman when I look at Rashida, but I can see how others don't. I can remember reading interviews with Kidada who talked about how difficult it was to be around her siblings who were all whiter and more Anglo looking than her. Rashida, on the other hand, has dealt with her own form of discomfort around both black and white people.

Rashida is doing pretty well for herself. I always give the kids of famous folk the side-eye at first when they hop into the celebrity spotlight, but Rashida has good comic timing and certain smart, yet wonky charm. I first noticed her as the secretary of the short-lived FOX series "Boston Public." I hated that show, but she was good in it despite being a little wooden from time to time. I remember being a bit struck by the fact that she had blondish hair but didn't look like a white person. Then when I learned her name was "Rashida" I knew it was a slim chance that she didn't have a secret Negro running around somewhere in her blood. After I learned she was Quincy's daughter it all made sense.

Rashida is a Harvard grad. She claims she struggled with her identity there and was "rejected" by some traditionally black sororities. While I feel Rashida on her inability to fit in, I've never met a black sorority who turned down an not-black-black-woman considering that many black Greek organizations have historically LOVED women who can pass a paper bag test and LOVE any women, black or NBBP, who have rich, famous fathers. I'd like to know which sorority this was. The "we hate light-skinned chicks" sorority because I've never met that one before. I don't know of an AKA, Delta, SGRho or Zeta who would not accept your check and the chance to list you on the famous sorors Web site.

I'm not sayin' the ish didn't happen, but I'm just wondering whether they turned you down because they really, really, REALLY didn't like you. And sororities like bitchy. How bitchy do you have to be to get turned down by the top bitches at the school? Really, Rashida? Really?

I'm sorry, I'm going off on a tangent here. Where was I?

Rashida, like her dad, likes her lovers to be pale as hell. She was once engaged to music DJ Mark Ronson and Spider-man/former child actor Tobey Maguire. I don't know how you manage not to marry Tobey Maguire, but I'm assuming Rashida knows something I don't. She's been romantically linked to Josh Hartnett (I guess he's cute), Seth Meyers (he's funny, I guess) and "The Office's" John Krasinski.

C'mon! How do you not make it work with the handsome funny guy from "The Office?" He's Jim! I'd cross over for Jim!

This dating pattern is a stark contrast from Kidada, who, seriously, is like one degree darker than her sister with darker hair. Kidada was most famously the girlfriend of Tupac before he was murdered. I'm not suggesting that Rashida date tatted up rappers, but, you know, consider a black man once in a while. Your mother did!

Unlike some of my other favorite not-black-black actors and actresses, Rashida's been able to remain steadily employed and I don't mean to imply an nepotism in this, but c'mon, I bet its a little easier to break into the business if you're Quincy Jones' daughter rather than Tyronne or Rufus Jones' daughter. Even Halle Berry had to fake her way to the top by convincing casting directors that she was a good actress when she was as dull as cardboard.

But she sure is purrty.

Rashida kept popping up in the most unexpected places, like "Chappelle's Show" (in one of my favorites, the 'love contract' skit), the films "Little Black Book" and "Full Frontal," a short-lived British drama called "NY-LON" and a cable cop show called "Wanted." Then she finally wowed her way onto hit sitcom "The Office" during the second season as Jim's girlfriend, Karen.

She's now on "Unhitched" this horrendous new FOX show that I will likely not watch as FOX makes horrible romantic/comedy shows. I don't know why they can't just remake "Herman's Head." At least that was kind of edgy. But FOX's dramadies tend to be very heavy on the sex and body function humor and lacking in any depth or substance.

That said, I still hope that someday she will end up on another decent show beside "The Office" that I will actually watch to see if her lazy, wonky comic delivery remains or if her serious acting chops have matured. I still don't know how she avoided that not-black-black-person clusterfuck known as "Anne Rice's Feast of All Saints." Everyone from Victoria Rowell to Nicole Lyn to Jennifer Beals to Gloria Ruben to Earth Kitt to Ruby Dee was in that thing. Maybe she and Nicole Lyn went for the same part and Nicole got it.

And how did Wentworth Miller avoid this? He would have been oodles better (and historically more accurate) as the main character rather than little Mr. Peroxide from "Half n' Half." Or at least Evan Ross, another famous NBBP with a famous last name who I'll save for another day.

Suspicious stories about black sorority snubs aside, I still like Rashida as an actress and as a NBBP. She's pretty and funny. But please, keep the bangs. You have a Tyra Banks five-head without the Tyra Banks perfectly symmetrical supermodel face. Bangs are your best friend.

Fabulous!

Young, Black and Fabulous is reporting that my Flo-Mo hometown girl is bringing her not-black-black-ass to St. Louis to host Fashion Week later this month.

St. Louis is not known for its fashion sense. (Is a Cardinals cap with a Budweiser shirt and black sweatpants a fashion statement?) But the city is still trying to throw down a serious fashion week. I wasn't too excited about it at first, but now that I know Kimora Lee Simmons and her tackilicious reality show is coming to town, well this, this I gotta see!

I've already regaled my readers a-many o' times about how Kimora is from my native St. Louis and grew up in Florissant, Mo. where I spent my high school years. I think my mother once met her mother and I think I had a hairdresser who knew her mother, but that was the closest I ever got to her. I've followed her career since she hit it big as a teenager and was shocked (SHOCKED, I tell you!) when all the hype was taken away and she was just as tacky and crazy as every other Negro in St. Louis.

I should not have been surprised by this, but I'd already put in my head at 15 that she was some classy high fashion model, not a tacky person doing a bad impression of a classy person with a garish handbag. But jokes aside, I still like her. Yeah, she's arrogant and abusive and kind of insane. But if I still openly claim other questionable people known for their mix of the "high and ghetto" (Prince, Whitney Houston, Tyra Banks, Mariah Carey, etc.), I can still love Kimora. So maybe I'll make an effort to crash fashion week and say hello. I know she'll just ignore me and scream out who let in the loud, pushy black woman who keeps correcting her grammar, but I've got a better chance at meeting her than Prince.

He snuck in and out of those concerts in a box, people. A box.

I never had a chance.

Cheer Up Obamamaniacs!

Since my brain is toast from my Super Tuesday part deaux watching, let's all focus on something shallow.

Is my Florissant, Mo. homegirl turned golddigger, turned fierce sceintologist (seriously, I just don't see her dedicating herself to this unless it involves Balenciaga and Prada), too much for her outfit? I mean, you can't really see all of it because she's all hugged up on Djamon Honsu, but it looks like she's wearing a slip with a super tight strap holding the top up.

Eh, she's like more than 6 feet tall. I'll let her have her fun. Party on, not-black-black-person!

Not you Kimora!

Some readers of The Black Snob may notice that I have an obsession with my not-black-black-peoples. NBBP (pronounced N-double-B-P) is my term for biracial or multiracial people with a dollop of blackness in their family history.

These folks are usually people who others don't realize are part black. But while some biracial people take on the black union label (Barack Obama, Halle Berry) others prefer to either be recognized as multiracial or non-racial (Tiger Woods, Mariah Carey). I'm fine with that. I feel people should be able to define themselves. So the least offensive way I could come up with to describe my fellow coloreds was "not-black-black-people."

And one of my favorite NBBPs is my tackylicious Florissant, Mo. homegirl, ex-fashion model, weed aficionado, business woman and professional digger of gold -- Kimora Lee Simmons.

And now, after taking Jada Pinkett Smith and her slightly dull husband, Will, the Scientologists have come for my crazy Kimora.

Nooooooo!

Courtesy of Young Black and Fabulous:

So….Kimora and Djimon are the new Tom and Katie? Those Scientologists strike again. And is that an engagement ring KiKi?? I know you wouldn’t wear your wedding ring from your last marriage while you’re dating a new man. And suspiciously hold up that hand only in damn ear every pic from the Baby Phat after party this weekend. How interesting….

Not my Kimora, lover of gold everything, crazy representative of ridiculously fabulous tall black/Asian women. Owner of Baby Phat, the most garish of all the hip hop fashion lines, Kimora is the princess of priss and self-described "fabulosity." And she really likes making up words and being rich. She can be a bit much at times. Yet despite her crippling case of Privileged Heifer Disorder (PHD), I loved her. She was feisty and who doesn't like a feisty ex-gold digger?

What? No one?

Screw all of you! I love my tacky Kimora and I'm at a lost to why, oh why Jesus, did you allow her to be taken in by the Cult of Celebrity? Anyone but Kimora! Take Lil' Kim or Devon Akoi or Bai Ling. Not Kimora! They're going to use her to hawk books to young inner city kids! It's a conspiracy to spread the Xenu believers into the heart of the black community.

And the Scientologists took Djimon Hounsou too. Now they're just asking for me to punch somebody. Also, YBF is speculating that he and Kimora might be engaged. (What is Kimora trying to pull? Her own version of Seal and Heidi "All Day I Dream About Sex with Seal" Klum?)

I just don't understand. How could you fall for a narcissistic faith based on a book written by a hacky science fiction novelist?

Wait. Did I say narcissistic in relation with Kimora?

Never mind!