Clutch Magazine: Vanessa Bryant and the Baller Wife's Lament

Vanessa Bryant in New York Magazine.Monday for Clutch Magazine Online, I touched on a recent article by New York Magazine regarding the lives of actual pro-basketball player wives (not the drink-throwing, Vh1 variety). Reading the article gives you insight on why those on the losing end of the baller wife game would turn to reality TV to mourn their loses and salvage their egos. Because if you get that glass slipper in the form of a wedding ring, there seems to be a lot of fashionable perks for a woman newly flush with basketball cash. Case in point, the tale of Vanessa Bryant who stood by her husband Kobe Bryant -- even through a rape charge -- and reconciled with her hubby after considering divorce last year. Maybe it's love. Maybe it's love of "the life."

You be the judge.

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Clutch Magazine: Chad Johnson and Evelyn Lozada Do What Everyone Expected

Which was self-implode. The two more famous for being reality TV stars than Chad Johnson's football skills and whatever the hell Evelyn Lozada did before Vh1's Basketball Occasional Sex Partners, got into a domestic dispute last weekend that ended with accusations of Johnson head-butting his newly wedded wife in an argument over condoms. But considering he's a craven, sexist fame whore and she's an emotional wreck known for throwing drinks and punches -- none of this is really all that surprising.

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Vh1's "Basketball Wives" Solves Negative Image Problem By Getting Rid of Non-Negative Cast Members

Shaunie O'NealHey, how can Evelyn, Tami and Shaunie be mean to anyone if all the folks they were mean to aren't on the show anymore? Bullying problem solved! Just get rid of all the victims. (Including Jennifer Williams who was slapped and wouldn't drop the charges and Royce Reed, who all the other women decided they hated many moons ago.) Although, this is probably for the best for Kesha Nichols, as girl should have never, ever done that show. Got that, ladies? If you challenge the big three in the world's worst illegally pledging sorority you will get dropped from the line. Also: Don't come to me crying when Kenya Bell finally goes all Michael Myers on you. You guys throw drinks, bottles, yell and slap people. She stabs folks. She's not stuck on Vh1's Basketball Wives with you, you're stuck on Vh1's Basketball Wives with her.

Anger Management: Basketball Wives Reunion Edition

Basketball Wives star Tami Roman.Vh-1's Basketball Wives wrapped its fourth season this spring and it was a boozy haze of fights, bullying, more fights, more bullying, pettiness and finally Tami Roman and Evelyn Lozada (who used to not care all that much for each other) coming together to form Rage Wonder Twins all over Tahiti. So, naturally, the reunion had to be about "Hey, we're not bullies in stilettos! Look! We're all going to sit here and pretend to be normal. We're normal. Look, NORMAL! Tee-hee!"

Hahahahaha. No, girl. Y'all not normal.

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Hell Is A High School That Never Goes Out of Session

The cast of season 7 of Oxygen's Bad Girls ClubRecently a friend of mine got me to start watching two equally horrible, but hard-to-look-away from reality TV shows. One is Basketball Wives on VH-1 (both original flavor and LA). The other is Bad Girls Club on Oxygen. The first time I sat down to watch Bad Girls Club I almost had to leave the room because the women on there reminded me too much of all the things I'd tried so hard to forget about my childhood and teen experience, triggering a public school PTSD response.

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