It's Sunday so you know what I'm doing -- BRUNCHING! But the news doesn't stop just because I'm tipsy on Mimosas! Here's a round-up of things I've been keeping an eye on ...
People continue to try to blow up parts of New York. Times Square has reopened after a failed car bombing attempt Saturday night. A local vendor spotted the suspicious vehicle that was loaded with propane, gasoline and fireworks, but failed to detonate. (Reuters)
Dudes, if your dream is to become second fiddle to the radiance that is actress/cosmetics spokeswoman Halle Berry, here's your chance. After five years she and Canadian fashion model Gabriel Aubry are dunzo. Rumor has it it has something to do with their age difference (nine years) and him being with the hottest woman in the world, yet still desiring to look at other hot women. (Tricky how that is!) At least he had the decency to call it quits rather than go catting around town behind her back like some other folks who shall remain nameless. As the song goes, if your heart isn't it ... Favorite quip about the break-up from Gawker's Adrian Chen: "How cocky is this guy, getting with Halle Berry and then being like: 'Yeah, she's Halle Berry... but what about all those women who aren't Halle Berry?'" (Radar)
The White House Correspondent's Dinner was this weekend, aka "Nerd Prom." One day, I swears, I'm gonna crash that thing! If Kim Kardashian can show up looking all waxy there's got to be some room for a Snob up in there. Watch some video highlights at the link. (Gawker)
Millions of folks hit the streets nationwide as part of May Day rallies protesting Arizona's tough new anti-immigration law that gives police the ability to detain anyone who looks "illegal." (Washington Post)
The National Enquirer got all amped over the weekend by re-airing some 2004 era cheating gossip related to the President. You know? Even though no one has any proof and all parties involved are like "What now?" But never to let some good dirt get in the way, they ran screaming with the story, burning up their two-cents of credibility from breaking the whole John Edwards "You ARE the father" thingy and chasing down all 121 of Tiger Woods' alleged ladyfriends. Anyhoo, despite there being no smoke and no fire, Socialist Kenyan hatin' headhunters are offering $1 million to the first person who gives them some Obama cheating news they can use.* (National Enquirer)
* I've said this before and I'll say it again. If some random woman shows up in Obama's closet that woman is going to have to go into hiding because, God Lord, even though it takes two to tango and there will be plenty of folks disappointed in him, I know my people and her ass would be grass with 92 percent of black America. And, sweet big baby Jesus, if she's a black woman, she is going to have to move to Iceland to escape the 10,000 white suns of hate directed towards her. Don't believe me? I remember people going to bat for Mike Tyson -- MIKE FRIGGIN' TYSON -- after he was hit with a rape charge. And all he did was beat up people for a living.
Most black folks, including illuminaries such as Louis Farakhan and Jesse Jackson, went after the 18-year-old who brought the charges. And people STILL hate his ex-wife Robin Givens even though it's pretty much been proven that Mike is not a stable person and has some serious anger issues -- especially towards women. I don't want to know what folks would do in relation to the Great Hopemongerer. I don't want to see that. You don't want to know what happens to 22 million dreams deferred. Forget the drying up like a raisin in the sun part, or the festering boil part. No sagging like a heavy load. It would go directly to EXPLODE. Rielle Hunter only thinks she's being persecuted for schtupping a married politician. I can't see Oprah sitting down politely with any Obama mistress. I imagine she'd get one question out before she'd lose all sense, then would let out a piercing cry of "YOU RUINED EVERYTHING!" before beating her to a bloody, unrecognizable pulp with her bare hands. Then Gayle King would run over and pile drive into her screaming "THIS IS FOR MICHELLE!" before some poor production assistant would be tasked with trying to pry Gayle and Oprah from the woman's lifeless body.
I just ... I just don't ever want to see that and you don't want to ever see it either. The Scarlett Letter is REAL people.