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« Things We Lost In the Fire (And By Fire I Mean Snow Storm): David Paterson Fake Scandal Edition | Main | The CBC Is In The Money »
Wednesday
Feb172010

Tiger Woods To Apologize For All The Crappy Golf Papa Snob Had To Watch While He Was Away

Seriously. I was almost starting to get worried about Tiger. No one had seen him in so long I was convinced they were going to find him in a seedy Las Vegas motel, face down with a bottle of Jack and Ambien in one hand and a copy of a 1996 Golfer's Digest in the other. But apparently he's going to get out, show the flag and apologize to Papa Snob for leaving him and other golf fans with nothing to watch but really shitty golf for awhile, and announce that he's returning to play again. Good for him.

Remember what we talked about Eldrick! Keep the balls in the fairways and keep the pee-pee in the pants!

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Reader Comments (6)

Well you know that all the other golfers hate him. He has exposed their way of life that people were paying no attention to. Now they are all under the scrutiny of their wives and the public and is driving the other Pros nuts. so good luck Tiger, I hope that no one accidentally lets go of a golf club in your direction. I wonder will Elin stand next to him at the press conference with an idiotic smile on her face like som many other soon to be ex wives have.

Tiffany
http://liferequiresmorechocolate.blogspot.com/

February 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTiffany

There are some black stars coming out of the Winter Olympics. I hope they take up some of that endorsement money. I really don't want to see the Tiger in commercials anymore.

February 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDavid Wise

He needs to be real, dump the clueless, absentee, blonde brood-sow and live his life the way he reeeaaally wants to. Honesty is the best policy. That was a whole lotta hoes! Thats beyond the average baller-harem number. The fact is, golf is still a country club, elite, married white middle-aged guy sport for the most part and the only reason he wifed this nordic chick was for image purposes. Its clear that his true type is skanky air-head and they won't look good showing up to the pga tour with 5 lbs of hair extensions, tig-ol-bitties, octo-mom lips, tube tops and booty shorts. Golfers don't go to night clubs and boink pornstars. They are family guys with demure, conservative wives, little "Children of the Corn" looking kids with names like "Hannah" "Zach" and "Megan" and trusty golden retrievers. He wasn't " Keepin' it Real" and now he looks like a damn fool.

February 19, 2010 | Unregistered Commenternovanova

I sick of the Tiger bashing. Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone. None of us can throw stones at Tiger, Kwame or King David for that matter. I so sick of the bashing. I don't care the color of the woman he slept with. yes. I was disappointed in Tiger. But I remain his fan. He will get through this whether the black community (or white community for that matter) support him. I predict that the black community will support him because this situation will only make him a better human being, father and husband.

Let's stop the bashing and look in the mirror. We are all sinners.

February 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNita

@ Nita, Ditto!!! Serious he's a human being just like the rest of us! Besides all this time we've spent moaning and groaning about Tiger, is better spent looking for a juicier scandal!! And What da eff is up with the Vanity Fair cover? It makes him look like a wuss!!!

February 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFaith Liamano

that cover cracks me up. :)

February 20, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterknowles

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