"You can't think that just b/c you are with a WM or in the white community that all of a sudden you will be treated like a white woman" Did you really just say that, Politically Incorrect? Wow. I expect to be treated like a human being and with respect- at all times and by all people. And yes, I do consider that a realistic expectation, whether or not others choose to treat me that way. I will not ratchet down my expectations based on other people's beliefs and prejudices. I set my own standard. And that's one of the things I love about the BWE websites - they set a standard and refuse to be moved from it. I let others catch up with me (if they choose) - I won't slow down for them.

Sigh, I am not saying anyone should accept a lower standard. Racism and sexism must be called out no matter what color and gender the person who is doing thats all I am saying. Stop acting like white men are exempt from that nonsense, they are the ones whos sign checks of black men who make misogynistic rap and don't even give them record deals if the rap about something positive and don't give female rappers deals at all. They are also the ones that make sure non black looking girls are in the videos.

Are you guys are gonna complain about that white man who snatched that Rosa Parks sign from that black woman and ripped it up? That was an act agression to me.

How many of these BWE bloggers are married? Two?

Why the hell should any black woman listen to their ideas about how to get a "quality" man when the majority of them are over 35 and SINGLE?

What a joke. They can advise me on who and how I should date AFTER THEY get married.

And who established that these women are CREDIBLE in the first place? Were there votes taken that I am unaware of? Any loser with a computer can start a blog. Their advice is no better than anybody else's.

I like the BWE blogs because I feel they discuss views rarely voiced in the larger black community. I often agree wholeheartedly with BWE bloggers and had felt like I was in a bubble in reading and seeing reactions to current events in main stream black publications and blogs.

For instance, I was horrified by the R. Kelly rape trial when I saw protestors and often black female protestors defending his actions. I think BW need to wake up to how much we have been sent messages from birth that we are worthless.

Even in reading the comments here I am AMAZED at posters who claim to be BW who so effortlessly repeat things like black women are the "bottom of the totem pole" and "undesireable to the majority of men". Obviously who can care for us if this is what WE believe about ourselves. Even if there are people who believe these things WHY oh WHY would BW themselves repeat them? If we are discussing negative stereotypes, I think we can agree BM are said to be criminal, violent and lazy. I have NEVER in my life heard a BM accept or acknowledge the criminal and lazy stereotype, in fact every BM I know works tirelessly to fight those perceptions...yet I see BW embracing and repeating stereotypes about us. The BM I know believe themselves to be exceedingly handsome and brilliant! They also seem to believe BM in general to be good looking and more virile than any other group of men. They seem to have pride in that. Also many of those men who have such pride and confidence in thier own beauty, will find the same dark skin that they cherish in themselves...unappealing in black women.

Yet, they are free to dislike dark black skin if they feel so, that I believe.

We as BW have grown up in communities that are hostile to us...and many of us do not even know it. Can you have love and respect for other black women if you feel you yourself as a BW have so little value? If you feel your natural hair is "unattractive" or "unappealing". Ms. Solange is wearing her NATURAL hair yet the BC is so used to seeing her with piles of fake hair attached they do not even seem to recognize what a black woman looks like in her natural state. And yet now that they have seen her natural...the concensus seems to be responding NO

And where did we get these notions? How are we perpetuating these ideas? How do little black girls get the idea that they are "less than"? It was told to me all during my younger years, yet I rejected those notions. Many BW are walking around carrying these feelings of inadequacy inside.

I also find it quite horrible and cruel the way in which BWE bloggers are consistently attacked for their looks and marital status. The majority of black people are overweight and unmarried, both male and female.

I have a genetic pre-disposition towards thinness. I can eat for days and never gain weight. I am size 6 and work out religiously. Yet obese BM have no problem "chatting me up" seemingly unaware of the huge guts protuding over their pants. I don't have harsh things to say about them regarding their size, I understand the health issues in the BC. I just keep it moving. We all have issues with our appearance. Men are keenly aware of womens weight and appearance, yet can't seem to see their own.

As for BWE bloggers crossing paths with IR bloggers. I have seen some exchange.

Yet with 70% of BW being single, what solution is there but IRRs?

We all know there are more BW in college than BM, yet I have never in my life heard a BM acknowledge that BW are more educated. This is a serious problem in the BC. Because there are fewer BM educating themselves they are becoming more isolated and this helps to perpetuate the anger and hatred towards BW.

If you ever hear this statement from BM...you should run and get a video camera "There are more working professional BW than BM"

Who should these women marry? No one seems to care...except a scattered group of women and IRR bloggers.

And maybe....just maybe they don't want to marry the sanitation man, who generally has 5 women already anyway. I must say NOT because they feel "they are better" than the sanitation worker.

In the Asian community, an educated woman does not have to explain why she doesn't feel much in common with the hot dog vendor.

Ahhh Cozy & Snuggly! Another 'Hitpiece' on Black Women...

The reader can pick up on clues to identify this strange combo of misogynistic/stalker/predator-protectionist behavior:

"I don't care about the IR bloggers, I just don't see why its seems they are now infiltrating the black women political blogs, which I think are fantastic and ground breaking. There will turn a criminal story into a race issue, a woman who has bad judgement is gonna run into a bad guy regardless of the race. Some women love thugs and its their fault and thats why they continue to meet them..."

An awful lotta trouble "Not to care..."

So now here is a man who reads BW blogs...Nothing inherently wrong with that, but listen out for the misplaced sense of entitlement... 1- Being a ---> BW's BLOG (Political, IR, Cooking or Otherwise)...The participants can discuss any topic(s) of their choosing ....2- Instead of AI graciously exiting a blog that doesn't suit his needs, he feels the need to denigrate the BW who do not fit neatly into his box (trapdoor)....

----------------------
"What are these "Empowerment" blogs you're talking about? Can we have examples? Because without references or examples I'm inclined to believe this is just a straw man argument put up to use as a punching bad against progressive black women."

"What blogs are we even talking about? Everyone's speaking generally, but I haven't come across any of the offending blogs.

Excerpts please!"
"@ poiticallyincorrect

Is it possible that you can give us some explicit examples of which specific BWE websites you are speaking of? In my experience, they all run the gamut just like any other group of blogs that center on a common cause. I believe this is an interesting topic, but I don't want to make the tired mistake of conflating ALL of the blogs together. Please provide specific examples and then we can discuss openly and intelligently. I eagerly await your response."

Contrarians such as these will NEVER provide any direct links, resources or quotes...Repeat after me "WILL NOT HAPPEN: They will continue to speak in circles and randomly lash out...Trying to get IIT's (Internet Ike Turners) to prove much of anything will be like trying to nail jello to the wall...Hence the weak response of not wanting to cause trouble or "mention another blog on this one..."...It is quite commonplace when making a point, to refer to the source at hand...
----------------------

"You can't think that just b/c you are with a WM or in the white community that all of a sudden you will be treated like a white woman"

The fangs really come out here...Black women cannot possibly expect to be treated like a full human being here...We must be within compliance at all times and be grateful for our beatings (Verbal or otherwise)
----------------------

"....The blogs I view talk about Black women needing to stop deluding themselves, and to accept a GOOD man's love regardless of ethnicity (not just White men), so that they can have the happy, fulfilling MARRIAGES, and legitimate children, they deserve. What is wrong with that?!...."

Absolutely nothing to normal, healthy, functioning adults who desire the same!

----------------------

"Stop acting like white men are exempt from that nonsense, they are the ones whos sign checks of black men who make misogynistic rap and don't even give them record deals if the rap about something positive and don't give female rappers deals at all."

Bring up irrelevant details when valid points are brought up and being asked to account for your words...I am not aware of anyone here who gets "Rap music royalties"

----------------------

"...All of those attributes that The Angry Independent just listed as reason for him not being attracted to black women are attributes that cross the color spectrum. He has to stereotype black women to justify his dislike of them. He couldn't think of anything more original, this is the same drivel that the mainstream media promotes."

I get sleepy and my eyes glaze over when hearing this same tired routine...

----------------------

"I have lots of friends in Europe, which is why I travel there more often (free places to stay, great for a grad student's budget). I have had a wonderful time traveling Latin America and I am planning to go Bahia and West Africa next year. Happy trails!"

K8Dee & Others who are traveling:

Enjoy your European excursion! Black women are FREE to visit ANYPLACE their time and budget allows...BW are not relegated to only traveling to locales where the natives 'look like them'...

----------------------

"I have a genetic pre-disposition towards thinness. I can eat for days and never gain weight. I am size 6 and work out religiously. Yet obese BM have no problem "chatting me up" seemingly unaware of the huge guts protuding over their pants. I don't have harsh things to say about them regarding their size, I understand the health issues in the BC. I just keep it moving. We all have issues with our appearance. Men are keenly aware of womens weight and appearance, yet can't seem to see their own."

I had one the other day who could have played a Black Santa Claus with holes in his shirt...In that condition, I'd be ashamed to approach ANY woman...'Tis is life I guess : )
----------------------

To sum it up: Hopefully any BW here who interacts with AI isn't counting on any serious dialogue...This will be a another merry-go-round in the center of the "Foggy Forrest" in which the poor unsuspecting soul will never find a way out...Let's ask ourselves some questions:

-Why do these factions who say that BW are "XYZ" and that they're "divested" and through, continue to lurk, troll or otherwise disparage us?

-Do BW take the words of these same characters as being anything resembling legitimacy and relevance?

-How many of the same males speak out in reference to crime against BW & children? Where are BW's defenders?...Instead, their subject of choice are BWIR and other female oriented blogs...Talk about finding a nice cushy soft-target!...Gotta question these lame ducks who consistently interject themselves in the middle of the henhouse...Telling BW what "they should do", instead of being being a leader & example...

Knockout chick said:

"I also find it quite horrible and cruel the way in which BWE bloggers are consistently attacked for their looks and marital status. "
---------------------------

I totally agree that personal attacks are immature and unnecessary, but marital status is absolutely relevant when you have a group of women advising you on how to get into a quality relationship. Why should I listen to a woman's advice on marriage, relationships and partnerships if she's SINGLE? That makes no sense whatsoever. Obviously her own advice is not working for her so why should I listen to her?

If they want to advocate black women abandoning black men in droves and instead seek out marriages with "quality" (also known as WHITE) men, then I would prefer that women who have actually DONE IT SUCCESSFULLY advise me. If they want to talk about black women "divesting" and leaving certain careers and neighborhoods, then I would prefer that women who have DONE IT SUCCESSFULLY advise me. I doubt these bloggers offering all this advice have done even 10% of what they're telling other black women to do.

BWE bloggers are constantly talking about vetting people who you let into your circles. Well who is vetting THEM? I'm still waiting for an answer to my question about what it is that makes these women credible.

@ALL

Just to highlight an example...Myself (And other BWE bloggers) done all of that and THEN SOME...But what I want BW to realize is that there will ALWAYS be something else required before she is acceptable to certain factions...Black women...DO.NOT.FALL.FOR.THIS.TRAP....Stop jumping thru these peoples hoops...Live life on your own terms!

"I totally agree that personal attacks are immature and unnecessary, but marital status is absolutely relevant when you have a group of women advising you on how to get into a quality relationship. Why should I listen to a woman's advice on marriage, relationships and partnerships if she's SINGLE? That makes no sense whatsoever. Obviously her own advice is not working for her so why should I listen to her?

If they want to advocate black women abandoning black men in droves and instead seek out marriages with "quality" (also known as WHITE) men, then I would prefer that women who have actually DONE IT SUCCESSFULLY advise me. If they want to talk about black women "divesting" and leaving certain careers and neighborhoods, then I would prefer that women who have DONE IT SUCCESSFULLY advise me. I doubt these bloggers offering all this advice have done even 10% of what they're telling other black women to do.

BWE bloggers are constantly talking about vetting people who you let into your circles. Well who is vetting THEM? I'm still waiting for an answer to my question about what it is that makes these women credible. "

TT, I find your assumption that the BWE/IR bloggers are unmarried/never had relationships with WM or other non-black men or do not follow the advice that they give on their own blogs - that appears to be the basis of your claim against the credibility of such bloggers. Instead of looking to the substance and common sense of what they say, checked against the facts that they give out, you have set up this straw man argument as the basis of claim against their credibility. Well, even your strawman argument fails, since all of the IR bloggers on the blogs I read (and I read about 8 of them regularly) are either married to white or other non-black men or are or have been in relationships with white and/or other non-black men. So now that your concern on this subject has been satisfied, I am waiting to hear the next excuse you come up with for not wanting to hear the message being delivered by these bloggers. I am sure you will come up with one - anything to avoid dealing with the substance of what they have to say. You don't have to agree with what they say, but don't lob these silly, transparent and non-factual excuses for avoiding the substance of what they say.

Also, of general interest, msnbc.com has an article on the low marriage rates for educated black women.

Your response is truly disappointing, CW.

You all advise black women to vet EVERYBODY in their lives, yet when someone suggests doing the same with YOU, all of a sudden it's a problem. Now I'm trying to make you "jump through hoops". That's laughable, considering I'm just a random black female reader. Nobody has to jump through any hoops for me.

So the BWE bloggers are above being vetted? Why? YOU don't listen to advice or suggestions from any random person on the street or online so why should anybody else? I'm supposed to just assume that because you're a black woman using some of your free time to write these blogs that your intentions are good and your advice is credible? That's the TOTAL OPPOSITE of what you teach! Vetting is one lesson from the BWE bloggers that I've actually implemented in my life with great results; how disappointing to see that you all only support vetting as long as it doesn't involve you.

I'm not asking you or anyone else to post your full name and social security number. I'm asking what makes BWE bloggers a credible source on matters of marriage and divestment? Have you had personal success with the advice that you are dispensing to other women?

Sandra, you responded while I was typing my last response.

Who said I wasn't hearing their message? I read several of the blogs on a daily basis and I've implemented some of their advice with great results. However I don't comment because my experiences have shown that they and their supporters do NOT handle criticism well at all, even when presented respectfully.

Anyhoo, I never said that because they aren't married that ALL of their advice is useless. Their credibility to me depends on the subject. If CW or Evia talks about marriage, I would probably sit up and take note because guess what? They're both MARRIED. If someone else left their "helping profession" and became self employed and developed different income streams, then I would absolutely heed their advice because they've DONE IT. Credibility depends on the person and the subject. NO ONE is credible on all subjects all the time.

I absolutely will not follow the advice of anyone who is not leading by example. If you think that's a straw man argument...well, we can agree to disagree.

Besides, the BWE bloggers always say "Take what is useful to you and discard the rest". That's exactly what I've been doing.

@ poiticallyincorrect"I am sure most of them are just men who have trouble getting women I wouldn't take it so personal. They don't have the guts to say stuff like that to our face."

Clearly you have never walked down any urban street in any city and you have been spared the insanity - prayerfully that blessing will continue. In cities like DC, Philadelphia, New York women have that experience on a regular basis. As far as not taking it personally the recent killings at the LA sports club proves that these troubled individuals regardless as to ethnicity can and do boil over and have deadly consequences.

"You can't think that just b/c you are with a WM or in the white community that all of a sudden you will be treated like a white woman"

Why not? This is a rather silly notion. Regardless as to who I am with or where I am by virtue of being a human being deserve to be treated with dignity respect and courtesy. That is a non-negotiable and an expectation as natural as breathing- to even consider anything else serves no good purpose.

SMH `

However I don't comment because my experiences have shown that they and their supporters do NOT handle criticism well at all, even when presented respectfully.

Why is that?

Does it occur to them that folks could be agreeing with some of their points but may have some questions. Is it a lecture or a dialogue. We are all adults right? Folks are going to have questions and comments. The bad attitudes is why they have some much in fighting with each other.

And I really don't give a damn about IR really, I just don't get how easily you guys brush off white male supremacy role in society and in social heirarchies. People just have legitimate questions. No one is trying to attack YOU.

And I don't think most have them have divested, you can tell they always telling people to divest but not how to divest. They seem to have too many interactions with the underclass to be divested people.

@ TT,

Now these bloggers need to be "vetted"-ridiculous. You said yourself you would consider advise from a married blogger regarding relationships and marriage-what grown woman needs to consult an anonymous person in cyberspace to figure out who to date? I don't know which blogs you are reading, but most of the Black female blogs I read (like this one) discuss politics, common interests like art, music, finances, etc.

HI did not hear anyone in this convo say blogs of any stripe are great for relationship/marriage advice. That is something you threw out there just to bleat "they ain't got no man no way"-which is unoriginal and outdated, esp, when you are talking to obviously intelligent women.

consenting adults should be able to date/marry whoever they want to without judgement from sidelines...i've been to some of those black women empowerment sites and have actually spoken with the owner of one of the sites and let me tell you, not ONCE did she bash black men. what we talked about is being open to all possibilities and not settling for less than what you deserve...how is that wrong?

Cosign with Knockoutchick, CW, Sandra and Starrie.

@TT:
“If they want to advocate black women abandoning black men in droves and instead seek out marriages with "quality" (also known as WHITE) men, then I would prefer that women who have actually DONE IT SUCCESSFULLY advise me.”

What is this obsession with the idea that only a WM can be a quality mate? I have yet to visit a BWE/IR blog that says that, or any variation on the theme. (“Date a White a guy” might, I don't know, never visited, but you've peaked my curiosity.) And if your remarks were some sort of ATTEMPT to defend BM, you've done a piss-poor job. What you've wrote is really quite insulting. And not just to BM.

As far as the advice givers go, the blogs I have visited were created by women who are married – one as recently as July of this year. And she was criticized by naysayers for marrying a man who is part Black! Which just proves how SOME people are choosing to miss the point of the entire movement. (In fact, I believe it was Cheryl Weeks, aka CW. ) IT'S NOT ABOUT MARRYING WHITE MEN! They are not the only other men on Earth. Take a look around.

@Aabaakawad and politicallyIncorrect:
“Let me start by noting an important issue has been brought up in this discussion, namely that precious little is said about what happens after the BW gets her quality (typically white) man. After all, that stage in the process is barely more than halfway along the arc from leaving the quicksand to being in a safe, comfortable, and thriving situation amongst the majority non-black coworkers, friends, and in-laws of that BW's prospective new life. I agree. The BW being counseled needs to think through and be prepared for the pitfalls she will encounter, and how they do (prejudice, misogyny) and don't (cultural differences) derive from the system of white patriarchy we all still live under.”

This important issue is no more important than when a BW dates/marries a BM and his family objects to her because they feel her skin is too dark -- which happened to a friend of mine. Another friend married a BM who's mother and father both hate her because she's health conscious and refuses to eat the “soul food” that's had led to most of their family looking like beached whales. My cousin is married to a BM who's mother accused her of “trying to be White” because she's a vegetarian, like myself, and didn't eat her pot roast. And how many BW have been catcalled/harassed on the street by one or more strange BM and then called a “WHITE b*tch” because she didn't respond with interest?

BW have to put up with a LOT of ish in this society, but the lion's share comes from other Black people. Male and female. When we do face racism and misogyny from the outside, we're not surprised by it and it's not as deeply hurtful -- for me anyway -- as when it's coming from one of “our own.” As far as cultural differences are concerned, there are many cultural differences between Blacks in America. Most of them are based in class differences -- something we go to great lengths to pretend doesn't exist for us, as it does for every other ethnic group on the face of God's green Earth. Others are based in mixed “racial” heritage – non-AA family traditions and the whole light/dark thing that most Blacks would love to keep quietly in the closet, because it points to the self-hate that many in the BC were raised to embrace. And don't even get me started on the whole “Coming to America” REAL Africans versus AA thing. With all that going on, what difference could it possibly make if your boyfriend/husband's parents are non-Black and bigoted? It won't be new to you. And if he is a quality MAN he will put them, and anyone else who has a problem with who he chooses to love and marry, firmly in their place. Just like a quality BM would.

Well, damn. I didn't realize this was such a hot-button issue. Maybe somebody needs to create some black male empowerment blogs and even everything out.

@Andrea,

No attempt to defend black men over here. They're men; they can defend themselves. I'm simply writing about things I've been observing on these blogs. Supporters seem to get more riled up than the bloggers when someone disagrees but it's all good. We can agree to disagree.

It's so amusing to me when people say "The bloggers never say quality equals white!" when some of them have nothing but WM/BW couples posted on their sites. If a quality man can be of any race, where are the pictures of quality men of every race (Asian, Latino, Indian, Black, etc.)? And let's not even GO THERE on how some of them use pictures of black women and white men who are simply posing in a picture and are not actually dating OR use catalog and stock photography, but put captions about the models as if they are a real couple. LMFAO!

And regarding CW's marriage, I was happy to see her get married! But I also noticed how DEVASTATED some of the "supporters" were. "Oh my God, do you realize how this makes us look! It makes it seem like we really CAN'T get a white man!" Folks talking about they will never support her work again! I never laughed so hard in my life! So yeah, I WOULD say a lot of folks are missing the point of the movement and unfortunately it seems to be some of the SUPPORTERS. If white men are not the focus, then showcase other men! I believe Evia is starting a series on that and I applaud her. It's LONG overdue.

@politicallyincorrect

Thank you for mentioning the infighting. I've also noticed these BWE bloggers taking subliminal potshots at each other in their writings and it's not a good look.

So anyhoo, I will continue to do what I've BEEN doing when it comes to these BWE blogs: taking what is useful to me and discarding the rest. Black women are not a monolith so we will all have different reactions to what these women say.

You ladies have a good weekend!

Lady M: the black male empowerment blogs (and videos - check youtube) already exist, in droves! In fact, many of the BWE blogs were started in response to these BME blogs and videos. You might want to check out some of these BME blogs and videos - you'll have your eyes opened for you!

@ TT

My .02

I think that one reason why you don't see as many photos of BW and Latin or Indian men is often these marriages were much more common....especially in the Caribbean, so much so that no one designates them immediately as IRRs.

Due to race mixing also often these couples can resemble each other so closely few are aware they are IR married. Except those close within the family circles.

A close black GF married an East Indian man and they are so close in complexion, body shape and size they look like cousins.

In Trinidad you have a lot of black/East Indian unions...it is nothing to make a blog about really ;-)

I think the BW/WM pics serve as a stark back drop and it excites some ....infuriates others.

I have dated an East Indian man and walking down the street with him was a peaceful stroll.

Yet when I was dating a tall, blonde waspy man people nearly got whiplash...especially BM.
Everyday was another annoyance.

As a woman who has dated men of all races, and has friends of all races. Nothing gets more attention or brings more misery and aggression than an attractive dark skinned BW walking down the street with a blonde man in a suit. If the white man is attractive some BM act as if they are in need of a ventilator. It is still unsettling to some.

All of this has underlying issues of race and class. One elderly BM walked up to me and my Ex and said angrily "Whte men own everything in the world and now they try to take the best of black women. You won't be happy until you have everything"

So put a picture up on your website of a dark black woman like a Kenya Moore and a pale blonde guy and the clicks will go through the roof!!! It is not that difficult to get people riled up.

It keeps the tongues wagging and the keys clicking!

Now, TT, you are not telling the truth. I read CW's blog and the only people who came on her blog giving her grief about her marriage were the BM trolls who post on her site. If you read her blog, you would have recognized the names of these trolls and known them for who they are. CW's readers did. But you choose to jump in the kool aid without knowing the flavor and spread falsehoods.

As for some of the pictures used on some blogs, again your arguments/questions are not new and have been made before. As the blogowners have explained before: where "regular people" are concerned, they post the pictures sent to them; where celebrities are concerned, they use pictures of people who are either currently or have been in IR's. So the picture posted is the picture in reality - where real relationships are/were concerned, they don't get to determine the ethnicity/race of the partners involved - they are what they are. The reality in America is that WM make up the largest segment of non-black men, so it stands to reason that a lot (if not most) of the BW IR relationships in the US will be with WM. And some of the blogs I've visisted do post pictures of BW with Latino men and Asian men, so if you're claiming there are no such pictures, you haven't looked closely. As for sometimes using stock photographs or models, why not? Most of these types of stock photos were created to accompany an IR article someone wrote or come from a tv commercial or print ad, etc. If the photo fits the theme of the blog or the particular post, why shouldn't it be used? Many articles and blogs use stock photos (including blacksnob) when the photo fits - I don't see why this is illegimate unless the blogowner purposely tries to mislead readers into believing that the stock photo using models is a real couple. Stock photos and photos using models are usually different and immediately identifiable from photos of regular people or celebrities.

And then you want to talk about infighting - if different BW disagree about something then that apparently for you goes to the credibility of all BWE bloggers. Show me a blog where everyone agrees about anything - does that happen even on this blog? Each blog is the blogger's point-of-view, and should be judged on the merits of the arguments and analyses presented therein, not based on whether there's another BWE blogger or anyone else somewhere who disagrees. Michael Steele disagrees with Barack Obama on just about every issue - does that mean that Barack Obama lacks credibility because Mr. Steele disagrees with him? Yet they'll both claim to have the best interests of AA's at heart. BW are taking potshots (as you call them) at each other here on this blog on this and on other topics - is that a bad look for blacksnob.com? Or does it simply mean that blacksnob.com discusses topics that are ripe for debate (and with debate comes the possibility of disagreement)?

It's not the BWE supporters who are missing the point - it's the people who jump on blogs without reading the blog to understand the arguments and analyses being made. For example, PI claims that the BWE bloggers talkiing about "divestment" aren't even divested themselves - exactly how does PI know this? Another straw man assumption/argument to avoid understanding what the term divestment means in the BWE context. I believe "divestment" in this context was coined by Reverend Lisa Vasquez in her blackwomenblowthetrumpet blog, and Rev Lisa has defined this term in at least 3 posts that I have read. Yet PI jumps in stating that these BWE bloggers are not divested because they "have too many interactions with the underclass to be divested people". HUH?! Read the book before you submit your book report - I learned that in high school!

Hey Sandra,

1) CW's blog is not the only place that her marriage was discussed. I saw it discussed on SEVERAL messageboards and other blogs (not the IIT blogs either) and the sentiment of quite a few women was what I mentioned above. If you didn't see it, well, I don't have any control over that. lol But I know what I saw and it was EXTREMELY disappointing. These women out here are numerous; the Muslim Bushido even has a name for them: The "Where Da White Men At?" women!

2) Regarding the photographs, you said it's only a problem if the blog owner purposely misleads to make it seem like the stock photography couples are actual couples? THEY DO THAT! Two models, one BF and one WM smiling into the camera in OBVIOUS stock photography but the caption is about how in love they are? Get real!

3) I never said that I think every blogger should get along. I think each blog is different and serves a different purpose. But I have absolutely seen two bloggers in particular go at each other and to this day they make passive aggressive snide remarks at each other ON THEIR BLOGS. Disagreement is fine and even healthy; but talking mess about another blogger on your blog? Not a good look.

And it's not a bad look for the Black Snob because this is the HOT TOPICS SECTION of her site and she is not a participant. I don't recall ever seeing Danielle talk mess about another blogger on her actual blog but then again, I could be wrong.

@knockoutchick

I never thought about it in that way! I mean, everybody has to have a gimmick right?

TT, everything you've just said above to disparage BWE blogs could apply to this blacksnob blog and other blogs. There's nothing different about them - only your perspective. So what if bloggers want to go at each other on other sites - I've seen that all over and you must have also. What does that have to do with the substance of the message of the BWE blog? Either the message passes the merit/analysis test or it doesn't. If someone wants to get on another blog and badmouth your message - so what? There are people on other blogs talking about the discussion going on over here on this topic - so what? You pretend that the discussions on blacksnob are a good look because this is a Hot Topics Section - my dear, every discussion on a BWE blog could be termed a Hot Topics Section.